MY GOD WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO AMERICA - A WOMAN, A NIGGER AND NOW SEBASTIAN HORSLEY!

My book Dandy in the Underworld came out across America yesterday. 31 years ago Marc Bolan’s album Dandy in the Underworld was released on the same day. Its for you Marc.

America is going potty. TV shows. New York Times Book Review, Village Voice, whole page in the LA Times. And much much more. I am so tired. Of being admired. I have been offering myself gift wrapped to the world. Every day for the last two months I have been either interviewed, filmed or photographed. Even I am getting bored of talking about myself. I fear I am an amateur narcissist after all. I am sure it won't last and I shall finally give in to my narcissism and marry myself.

Does Christ never get tired of bleeding? I’m sure he does - but the show must go on.

I arrive in the USA next week. God knows how they shall take me. Does getting shot hurt? Actually, I am sure the marksman will be dazzled by the sight of me and consequently miss.

In truth if I do not return it will only be because I have been murdered by love. Like Quentin I have always felt American in my artificial heart. We are all English at puberty; we die American.

I’ve always felt the book would do better over there. I hate Britain’s rugged will to lose. In America, they love a loser turned winner as much as we love the opposite. As St Quentin knew : it is because of our hearts. The English have shrivelled hearts. The Americans plump, peachy, warm ones. Success in England inspires only envy. In America : hope.

It is because life for the Americans is always becoming, never being.

It is because of the cruelty of England and the generosity of America. In America people will only come to see you if they like you, if they wish you well. In England they will come because they despise you, to laugh at you.

It is because Americans are unafraid of being positive.

Poor old England ; sometimes negativity don’t pull you through.

I broadcast to 12 million of the US nation this week. Harper tell me that all Things Considered is probably the biggest radio show in all of the US.

The lady producer liked me

I said to her :

“Can I get my cock out on live radio?”

There was a deadly silence. “Oh No” I thought! “I’ve have blown it!”

Then suddenly she said :

“Awesome.”

12 million yanks is like one brilliant Brit really isn't it? Me. You see, what is good about England is that it prepares you for the world. Censure and criticism never hurt anybody. If false, they can’t hurt you unless you are a wimp, and if true, they show a man his weak points, and forewarn him against failure and trouble. It is through the snipers and vipers that we develop ourselves. Only the best get through so by the time we arrive in America we are ready to rule the world.

And rule it I shall. I have lost my reins and shall begin my reign. I am off to America for a week. I am sure everyone will be expecting me to go by boat and as I sail through the harbour, 'Wilde-like,' announce, 'I have nothing declare but my genius.' But I am not Oscar Wilde.

No darling, Whoresley-like I shall announce, “I have nothing to declare but my genitals.”

“My heinous, genius, penis.”

Bon Mot Voyage

Comments

[rockmother]

How absolutely splendid. I think it is all great and you deserve it. But have you re-entered yourself yet? That is when you need to start worrying and say goodbye to the artery-clogged morbidly obese salt-fed vicodin-bleached society that is America. That is when you need to run back to the white, pinched ravagers of Soho.

[harold hollingsworth]

I Love America, And America Loves Me to lift from Joseph Beuys and sew it on yourself! Like his transforming performance, we look forward to yours Sebastian. Being shot doesn't hurt, until much later, and after you wake, but with your schedule, waking will be for others!

[Sappho]

I am so ashamed of my country. Oscar Wilde was welcome in America, but not under the Bush Regime.

I live in the San Francisco Bay Area, where art,decadence and antisemitism are in vogue. I feel like I'm living in 1939 Berlin and it is truly frightening.

I apologize as an American. I look forward to the day you visit San Francisco. Your readings/exhibits/performances will be SRO.

[a.]

I'm an essayist living in Philadelphia. I heard your essay on NPR, and am currently 1/2 way through your memoir.

I'm very sorry you were turned away. I think Americans can stand to benefit from a little velvet and a little come.

[Gordon Hulley]

Ah well, pride before the fall Mr. Horsley.
I doubt I'd get easily into the US myself now...
I shall be reading your book.